Sometimes life takes twists and turns that can bring extreme joy or extreme pain. While at the same time we have lulls which can give us rest and relief. I don’t know what state you’re in, but I know that in any form it’s going to change. We’re not promised 100% happiness or 100% grief – although it can feel like it at times. For me, how I weather each wave that comes is completely reliant on my faith. Living single is not new to me and I’m finding different parts have different meaning.

I’ve always known something was different about me and my take on life. I’d say a few words that describe me are:

• giving
• loyal
• trustworthy
• joyful
• empathic
• determined
• loving

I’m sure many of you can relate to the optimistic view as well as the realistic view. While I’m not much on pessimism, I do take real looks at life and try to keep a “silver lining” attitude. Keep reading for a video interview where I answer your survey questions.

THE GOLDEN GATE BRIDGE

Oh, how I have always said that owning a home is like owning The Golden Gate Bridge. Did you know as soon as those workers finish painting, they literally start over again? ¹ Is that not just like owning a home? You are NEVER done.

For instance, over the last weekend, the city had to turn off the water main for several streets to make repairs from a break that occurred a month ago. It’s been over three years since I have the benefit of a fully functional faucet in my kitchen. I knew I would need to be the one to replace it three years ago and I was shopping for a new one and waiting until my neck and shoulder would tolerate it. While I did purchase the faucet last month, my vertigo deemed it to be a chore I dreaded even more.

Yes, I’ve replaced a handful of faucets over the years, so it’s truly a straightforward repair. Hey, I’ve even taught my kids how to do it as well. Just take out the old faucet and drop in the new, right? Well, I knew this one being made of solid brass is seized beyond measure based on another person not finishing the job previously. I knew the stems were going to need cut out and I wasn’t looking forward to working behind my 10″ deep basin with a bad shoulder and vertigo. Oh, the joy… (see I’m being joyful – sarcasm emphasized)

IT’S TIME

With the main being shut off I’m like, “GAME ON”. At least, while at the bank drive thru early this morning, I decided in a fleeting moment that today was the day. I didn’t plan for it, but already had everything and I was sick and tired of not having hot water, nor a sprayer, and having to always make sure my kid didn’t leave it running.

In basic plumbing anatomy, a faucet has two stems (hot and cold) that have threaded pipes under them. Those threaded pipes enter down through your sink top and the lock nuts hold them on. Typically, you hand tighten those lock nuts and that way they don’t seize. In my case, I’ve always lived with a Mr. Fixit – the character from Richard Scarry books that has a way with tools.  The last attempt in removing this faucet in that three-year period, two gentlemen can’t loosen those brass lock nuts, and they are left to rot.

Likewise, the guy who did the install of this faucet is also the same guy I catch pooping in my basement while installing my furnace. I mention that fun HERE.

MORE DRAMA

In addition to not feeling like doing this while living single for the first time (I don’t mind if this wasn’t a hard-core job), I panic because the previous morning, my senior cat, Lily, fends off an attacking by “Sylvester”. Y’all, this black and white male is forever pestering my two cats in my own yard. This time, Lily was yelling in a different way and came in not walking right. All that day and night, Lily would not come out from under the bed. She’s not one to do this and usually comes out to feed and goes in and outside all day.

This day, plumbing horror day, she comes out and I bring her food, but she stays under the couch.

Right as I am about to start my faucet replacement she decides to go outside, and I’m dancing a jig. I want her to potty like normal, but I also know she will want back in in about 10-15 minutes because it’s 26-degrees with a nasty windchill. In due time I got to check on her pausing my work and she won’t come in. She’s yowling and when my daughter tries to pick her up she SCREAMS the worst scream and bit her. Lily doesn’t bite. I knew something was majorly wrong.

We let her go and tried to keep an eye. Several times we tried to get her back in over the next couple of hours, but she ran away. Finally, we couldn’t find her at all. The only two kids with me at the time are my two daughters that are my best pet helpers. They keep checking while I’m bawling under the sink because I’m stinkin’ dizzy, I’m worrying my cat is off to die, and I’m furious I am left with this job.

BACK TO THE FUN

From 10 am to 9pm, I had to use my Dremel, and I tell ya, a thousand heavy duty blades to cut a notch in that lock nut, cut the stem end off and cut other vicious parts of this wretched faucet. Sledgehammer anyone?!? Talk about hard to hold my waving arms steady because of my vertigo while trying not to snap another blade. Again, after I snap a blade, I have to take a tiny screwdriver to remove a tiny screw all while my dizzy eyes don’t focus and my hands are unstable.

Do you see the notch I cut in the lock nut after I cut the bottom of the stem off? I had FOUR of these beasts to cut out.

One down three to go. At this point, I am beat.

Never mind I’m still jumping up to go find Lily in the freezing cold and fighting back tears that I’m a bad pet owner.

RELIEF

To say I feel insane relief when about midafternoon and mid project I go out to call her and she comes calmly walking in with a little “meow”. Her color looks better, her eyes brighter and I know she must’ve had the worst hairball ever and took a while to chuck it up because there is no way this is the same cat. Heart attack averted but yet I want to scream.

The two daughters I mention even set up a sort of hospital with her favorite treats, blankets, flannel nightgown, and a high spot for her to come in and recover. Even a step so she didn’t have to jump. Take a look at where she placed herself.

Treats eaten, cozy blanket and nightgown on the side, but somehow manages to lay on my drapes. The irony.

NIGHTFALL

Finally, it was at 9pm that night I hook up my water lines and am bout to make the final check when I realize I installed the faucet backwards. NOOOOOO!! For pity’s sake. It’s just like when I installed my emergency disposal a month ago along with a code-worthy GFCI outlet. I made a newbie mistake (and I’m not a newbie) and forget to turn on the power switch after rewiring it several times not knowing why it wasn’t.turning.on. grrr…

While I could have just called it quits because I have my laundry sink, I took it all apart and had it back right in under twenty minutes.

Do you hear the angels singing?

Am I glad it’s done. YES. Am I glad I had to do it? YES and no. I’m reaching the point where I know I can do all the things and I’m tired of doing them. Last year, before living single, I replace my gas cooktop, rebuilt my flowerboxes, rebuilt my retaining wall, replace my basement windows, rebuilt my compost bins, repair my car several times while also helping my kids with theirs, etc. I could go on and you get the idea. Married or living single, I’m all about learning how to take care of myself and my blessings. And I’ve been doing them successfully for decades.

SURVEY ANSWERS

As I mention in my new journey post, I asked you all to fill out a very simple survey so I can best answer questions. Today, I’m answering the random question you would have for me. In my next posts, I’ll tackle the autism and narcissism topics. For further reading, as I mention in my video, here are my previous explanations:

• Intro to My Neurodiverse Marriage
• Neurotypical Wife in a Neurodiverse Marriage – Part 1
• A Neurotypical Wife – Part 2 – here I discuss a bit about Malachi 2

I did get a little jumbled in my thoughts as I made that video, so I hope it answers questions and doesn’t give more confusion. Please feel free to email using my contact information in this post or at the top menu on my blog.

Not only do I know God has plans to prosper me, but also to prosper you. Jeremiah 29:11

SEE ALL LIFE UPDATES HERE

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FOOTNOTES FROM LIVING SINGLE

1. The Golden Gate Bridge

While you’re at it, more life updates like my living single: